I’m totally unsure of my opinion on the death penalty. I mean, if someone killed somebody else they deserve to be killed too. Just last month a girl I went to school with was shot and killed, and as much as I wish her murderer could just die I think that for him to live with that guilt forever would be just as terrible. I have so many thoughts on the death penalty that contradict one another. I mean, if they died wouldn’t it be an easy way out for them? Rotting in jail seems like a living hell. And I think for those that have to kill the prisoner, it would be something difficult for them to deal with. There are too many sides to the death penalty that I’m still so unsure of. 

I just answered this Featured Question; you can answer it too!

“When you think of a big black woman, don’t you think of syrup? Like Aunt Jamima” -Alyssa

I’m quite excited for college. Meeting new people, learning new things, having new life experiences. But *falls to knees* Why so expensive?! Not only do I have to pay to go to you, but for the books, laptop, the parking, the class fees, health fees, and the tickets I’ll get for driving two miles over the speed limit. I mean yes, I should’ve expected this, but damnit! I had plans to actually have money in my wallet. So much for that idea. I can already see the lint in my wallet, and the stale mints.  *sigh* I’m going to have to kill myself working overtime and two jobs. To have money for emergencies. You so better be worth it college. If I turn into yet another alumni that graduates but still gets stuck at a minimum wage job, I’m so kicking some major university butt!

So I’ve been reading up lately, and apparently there is some weird trend nowadays. Now I’m not hating on vampires or things such as so, as I am a HUGE Buffy the Vampire Slayer fan and a Lost Boys fanatic. But really? Is all this vampire pop culture stuff really all that great that going around biting people’s necks has to become a popular trend? I mean, some fans out there bite necks and draw blood to show their possession and love devotion. I’m not trying to judge here, but if someone bit my neck and drew blood I’d probably knock a mother effer out. Maybe that’s just me though?

I’ve also noticed that people think it’s mass cool to be sad. Now, yes I rant on a lot of stuff on my xanga, but that’s because it’s a blog and I have shit to get off my chest. But a lot of times when I’m out in public I see this group of people that build relationships and bonds by using their sadness and depression as a social lube. Maybe I missed the memo? I guess it said love the rain more than the sunshine, the darkness better than the bright side. *shrugs*

Don’t get me started on inflicting pain on yourself. I find this the most ridiculous trend that could ever be invented. I know of way too many dumbasses that staple their arms to get laughs, or do other wreckless crap. They either do this for the so called excitement of the pain, or to impress people. Do you really have to be so ignorant and risk your health and life on impressing people and getting excitement? There are other ways of excitement people, and there is definitely many more ways to impress people. Besides, if you have to act stupid and injure yourself to impress people I can only think of two things. A) Those people aren’t worth being around, and B) They’re not laughing because you’re awesome, they’re laughing because you’re the dumbass who’s stupid enough to do something ridiculous. 

Even though I’m a teenager, I don’t get some of these teen trends. I guess that’s why I was never popular, which I’m very okay with because all I can say is wow. But whatever floats your boat I suppose. 

You are absolutely the craziest thing I’ve ever had as a pet. I simply love it! Even though you kind of smell, and poop a lot I love you so much. You haven’t warmed up to me that much, but I know it’s because it’s only been three days. You will love me I hope. You’re just too darn cute xD 

My dearest Butterface,
I know we are not together yet, but I promise I will be the best mommy ever. I’m not sure where you are, if I will buy you, or if you have yet to be born. Just know, I will make your living environment the best I can. I will protect you from all the harm, and I will give you all the love in the world. Even if you don’t love me back, I will love you just as much. I can’t wait to see you my little Butterface Baby!

I throw my hands up in the air sometimes saying ayooo gotta let go, I wanna celebrate and live my life :] 

I absolutely love spending time with my family. Even though things get rocky, and a lot of the time we annoy the hell out of each other, we always have a good time when spending time together. I even got to bond with my cousin Noelle, which was a great experience because we never really spent time with each other. In fact, she didn’t even know we were cousins.

1. Go backpacking across Europe
2. Learn multiple languages
3. Take off Ronald McDonald’s face paint
4. Look like a fool with my pants on the ground
5. Pet a panda
6. Go white water rafting
7. Visit the Amazon
8. Turn the Hamburglar into the authorities
9. Learn how to dance
10. Become good at Bboying
11. Have it my way at Burgerking
12. Have the Burgerking have his way to me…just kidding, that’s disgusting
13. Climb a mountain
14. Volunteer at a homeless shelter
15. Visit China
16. Visit Korea
17. Visit Japan
18. Live in Taiwan
19. Fall in love
20. Stay in love
21. Meet a boy in university
22. Find happiness
23. Believe in myself
24. Have my own place to live
25. Have children
26. Buy a Mighty Morphin Power Rangers costume
27. See if I can suck a cloud into a vacuum cleaner
28. Go to the Caribbeans 
29. Buy a laptop
30. Graduate university
31. Road trip around the country with my best friend
32. Live by the ocean
33. Live in New York
34. Live in California
35. GET A JOB
36. Take school seriously
37. Become famous in Taiwan
38. Get advanced in drawing
39. Be in a horror film
40. Learn how to cook
41. Get into shape
42. Learn how to sew
43. Make Jodie like Bananas
44. Make Jodie eat sushi
45. Adopt a child
46. Save a life
47. Become more outgoing
48. Stop being shy
49. Learn the guitar
50. Change someone’s life
51. MEET JAMIE LEE CURTIS
52. Go on 100% Entertainment
53. Meet Seth Green
54. Makeout with Seth Green…wait damnit he’s engaged. 
55. Learn to do a kip up without breaking my back
56. Be in an argument that turns into a tecktonik dance battle
57. Make someone want me back, and then breakdance all over their heart >:]
    (revenge will be mine!)
58. Get a baby bunny :3
59. Learn to love myself
60. Model in pictures, deviantartesque 
61. Meet Bofo
62. Have a house with a history..and that doesn’t look like ass
63. Marry someone that’s as silly as I am
64. Threaten to chop someone’s thingy off for being sexual with a friend
65. Travel the world with the love of my life
66. Become Miss America
67. Be a pageant mom for only one day so I can kick those snooty mother’s prides in.
68. Laugh at my friend Shmalyssa because I waited until marriage instead of being sixteen
69. Go to Central Park
70. Sing in the rain like Gene Kelly
71. Learn to smile with my eyes like Tyra Banks
72. Lock myself in a car’s trunk
73. Send a postsecret
74. Find my Mr. Darcy
75. Have my cousin like me more than her grandma
76. Play in the rain with my children
77. Pose by a British Phone booth that’s blue with Jodie
78. Ask a Doctor, “are you the doctor?”
79. Dance and do gymnastics in a barn Kevin Bacon style
80. Be in a world of pure imagination 
81. Cover myself in maple syrup
82. Experience weightlessness 
83. Have a real Christmas tree
84. Make candy like the candyman does, mix it up with love and make the world taste good
85. Ride a horse
86. Fall off a horse (and not get injured)
87. Wrap a rainbow in a sigh
88. Convince the world that the mile high club actually means getting high on a plane
89. Learn to swim
90. Feel beautiful
91. Eat ketchup chips 
92. Make Bofo say Soda >:]
93. Meet Miss Cleo and laugh at her Ja-fake-an accent
94. Find a real life Shay and Divine
95. Make a real robot instead of kitchen supplies like when I was a child
96. Have a guy do the yawn and stretch to me xD
97. Become famous on youtube
98. Recover from Bieber Fever
99. Act like my eating utensils are aeroplanes
100. Fall asleep with a boy :3
101. Slap boy for trying to be dirty while sleeping
102. Forgiving boy for being dirty cause he has hand welt on face 
103. Dress up like Baby Spice
104. Dye my hair
105. Find Neverland
106. Find Carmen San Diego
107. Throw candy on the floor and watch children fight to the death
108. Bust my chin open brushing my teeth
109. Paint a dog like a panda
110. Build a time machine
111. Whisper all day
112. Speak binary for a day 
113. Kiss an Asian
114. See the stars of the future
115. Buy Jodie a Pig Rabbit  
116. Jam out at a Styx concert
117. Win a contest
118. See the World’s Largest Twine Ball
119. Get “saved” by a hot lifeguard (preferably one that’s a man)
120. Meet Shane Dawson
121. Learn to sing (good that is)
122. Have a boy sing Beach Boys to me on top of a dog house :3
123. Tell Paul London I love him 
124. Tell Matt Dallas I love him
125. Become friends with Holly Madison xD
126. Finally convince myself that Rivers Cuomo is too old for me
127. “Give all our love to each other, not this hate that destroys us”
128. Wang Chung every night
129. Go to clubs that don’t suck
130. Find a hairstyle I actually like on myself
131. Ask a cute boy for “directions” at college >:D
132. Have the perfect white wedding
133. Find a fiancee first
134. Do a Bollywood dance sequence, costume and everything

I have fucking had it with you parents. I am waken up today at 6 fucking am to you guys speaking shit about me. If you want to speak negatively about me, at least fucking do it using the truth. But that’s too hard for you guys isn’t it? You build up some horrible image of me, like I’m some God awful person. You act as if I’m some unappreciative and ungrateful bastard child. You treat me like I’m untrustworthy, you guys need to cut it out. I’m up to my neck in this, and as much as I act like it doesn’t get to me, it does. I can’t take this anymore, and I want it to fucking stop.

Mom, first of all, last night I did not try to sneak out of the house trying to take the car. A) I have never tried sneak out of the house once. B) Your vehicle is parked right behind mine, there would be no way for me to take the car. Unless that is I’m so fucking rebellious and fucking awful that I decide to rear end your car, smash into the house, and then cause some sort of explosion making my getaway to soon return home and act like I was here the entire time. C) I wouldn’t sneak out of the house, because unlike your ideas of me, I’m not a bad kid and I wouldn’t do anything like that.

(apparently this is my driving)

Dad, stop criticizing all my friends. Just because you had bad judgement in friends doesn’t mean I do. Stop saying I’m a bad driver, I’m perfectly fine. The only reason I have ever done bad at driving, is when you would cuss out drivers around me and then call me a dumb bitch, or a cunt. Maybe if you calmed the fuck down, I wouldn’t make rookie mistakes.

  You guys act as if I’m incapable of taking care of myself. I’m perfectly capable of walking down the street. If I want to walk to a friend’s house, you do not need to drive me there. Especially when it would only take around ten minutes, in broad daylight on a busy damn street. If I were ever in danger I wouldn’t throw myself at the asshole and say take me now you kidnapping bastard, I would kick some ass, and then run away. You say this is because I’m your only child. I understand your worries, but just because I’m your only child doesn’t mean you have to shelter me from life, and prevent me from experiencing things in life. Life is about taking risks, and just living, not sheltering yourself from what bad there is in the world. In case you have you haven’t noticed, the world is full of a lot of bad, awful, evil things but that doesn’t mean there isn’t any good. You have to step out from you paranoia bubble, and push past that because after you do that you know the world isn’t so bad..not so dangerous.

I tell you guys I never ask for anything. Yet mom, you still say I’m ungrateful, selfish. “I got you a car even after you didn’t ask for it.” That is true mom, but I always said thank you, I showed I was grateful…I am grateful. Why do you guys always notice the wrong I do, and over exaggerate it? I have never done drugs, I never smoked, I don’t sleep around, I’m still a virgin. I follow your rules, and when I do ask for that one thing I want I get yelled at. I want freedom, I want to live, I want to not be sheltered anymore. Why is that too much for you to give me? Is letting your control go that scary? I’m going to be nineteen very soon, I have been very patient. Throughout my life, I have followed your rules, I have pushed past my frustrations and sucked it up. I draw the line here, I’m nineteen, let me drive, let me go out, let me walk, let me live.

I’m in love with somebody I’ve never even met, or rather the idea of that future guy that will sweep me off my feet. I think about this mystery man all the time, and even though I haven’t met him yet or even know who he is I just know he’s out there somewhere.

Maybe it’s unrealistic to a lot of people, but I’m the type of girl that goes by her gut feeling. My gut feeling as of now has been telling me that I’m not too far from meeting this special someone. It’s like that Michael Buble song, Haven’t Met You Yet. I just know they’re out there, and when I meet them I will just know. 

I used to be in a rush to find a boyfriend, to be with someone. What I have realized since then is that when you rush, you don’t take your time to notice the ones you’re not compatible with, you jump into something too soon and it’s just heartbreak from there. I’m going to take my sweet time to eliminate all the douche bags, assholes, jerks, users, and abusers. Doing this I know that one guy will be there, to be sweet and considerate. He won’t find me creepy, weird, stupid, immature. I will be perfect to him, just like he is to me.